To Love Someone
by love-to-be-Dimka's
Summary: Jacob tries to make things right with his beloved Bells when he is forced to be away from her. Paul/Bella imprint story. Rated M for a reason!
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from Twilight. Stephenie Meyers does.

Chapter 1

BPOV (Bella's Point of View)

I, Isabella Swan was not looking for love coming to Forks but what did I do when I came here? Fall in love with a vampire whose name was Edward Cullen who evidently doesn't love me back because he felt the need to leave me but I'm stronger now and I don't need him. Now I just think of him and the rest of his family that I thought loved me as a figment of my imagination. I'm not the same weak girl they knew me as.

I moved on to Jacob whom I guess doesn't love me either as he sat there, told me to go home and that he never wanted to see me again. He broke his promise that meant so much to me. That shattered me into a million pieces and then I realized that nobody wants me but why?

_*Flashback*_

_I have had enough of Jacob ignoring me and decided to go confront him it has been to long and I wanted to help him id something was wrong. I got in my truck and left out to La Push and went to Jacob's house and spotted him outside his house and I parked my car quickly, got out and ran to him._

"_Jacob"_

_He came to an abrupt stop and he turned to look at me._

"_What do you want?"_

"_I just wanted to know why you have been ignoring me. Did I do anything wrong?"_

"_No its not you."_

"_Then what is it?"_

"_I can't tell you that."_

"_Why not?"_

"_I just can't Bella. Just go home I don't want to see you."_

"_No please don't do this" Now I was crying I can't believe that this is actually happening to me._

"_It's already done. Leave Bella"_

"_But you promised." A look of hurt and pain crossed his face but then disappeared as quickly as it had come and a blank expression set on his features. I was seething. He had nothing to saw he was speechless so I decided to add in something else. "This doesn't make you any better than what Edward did to me. You're just adding on to the list of people who don't want me but that's okay because I don't need you at all!" and with that I walked away to my truck sobbing._

_*End of Flashback*_

He tried to call me but I ignored all of them. Maybe its because the way I look that made people not want me. I know that I'm not pretty at all I'm just your normal pale face girl trying to find someone who actually loves her.

Charlie wasn't in the house most of the time and when he was he would be sleeping or watching the game or eating. All of the time that he is out of the house I take a knife and run it across my vein on my forearm and other places around my body to hide my pain in my scars and to take away I'm feeling by using physical pain. Or if not that I would drink to pass out and make it look like I was sleeping. I would deprive myself of water and food because I thought the reason was because of my weight.

I never go out much. I usually stay inside the house and drown in my own sorrow. I rarely look into mirrors but when I do I see all of the weight that I have lost, the scars, the red, puffy, baggy eyes. I looked horrible. I know I needed to stop my ways or else I would end up killing myself.

So I decided to go out to the diner out in La Push and eat something. It's been a year since I have seen Jacob. So it was a big surprise to see him walk in alone and sit down in the booth in front of me. He looked like he was sulking about something. But why should I care he is the one who didn't want me. I always wore a sweater to hide all of my scars that are still there even though I don't cut anymore. I ate my hamburger as quickly and a quietly as I could and paid. I tried to leave without him seeing me but that didn't happen of course.

"Bells? Is that you?"

I slowly turned around and sighed

"Yes its me"

"Well you should sit down so we can talk a bit" he sounded so desperate I don't know how I could turn him down.

"Ummmm…. Ok." I sat down quickly.

"So how have you been lately Bells?"

"Its Bella you cant call me Bells anymore and I have been alright" that's a lie I have been terrible.

"Oh sorry Bella would you like to come to the bonfire we are having tonight?"

His eyes were pleading. I didn't know what to say.

"I don't know Jacob you hurt me a lot"

"Bella I'm so deeply sorry for everything that I said to you I didn't mean it." I looked into his eyes and they looked so honest. "Come on Bella I will even tell you the reason why I couldn't talk to you at all there and we are going to be swimming, eating, hearing the Quileute Legends. It will be fun."

I did want to know sense the day he told me to leave so I guess I'm going to this bonfire.

"Fine I will go" His eyes practically sparked with joy.

This better be good.

**What did you think? Review!**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

**I own NOTHING!**

**I am so sorry for not updating as quickly as I wanted to I just have really bad writers block lately…**

I'm on my way to Jacob's house now for that stupid bonfire. I just really wanted to know the reason that Jacob decided to ignore me all of that time and made me feel so unwanted. I arrive at Jacob's house and I sit alone on one of the pieces of wood that is around the fire.

Jacob brings me over to all of his friends and introduces me to all of them. I give them all a small smile and shake their hand until the last person who I couldn't look away from. He had a nice sculpted chest and abs that were so defined.

"What is this Pale Face doing here?" he said. Oh my gosh he caught me eye screwing him! He's hot but he's mean. I quickly looked away because I started blushing.

"Um… oh s-sorry" I walked away quickly away from this guy named Paul. Gosh I cant even get words out of my mouth. I'm so pathetic. I started blushing even harder now. I probably looked like a tomato now I'm sure. I found myself resenting him. He just seemed to be like a big cocky jerk. I sit down before I do anything else that could possibly embarrass myself. He sits next to me on the log and I don't know why he is because its obvious that he doesn't like me very much. I also don't know why but I felt this pull but I didn't look him in the eyes but I don't know why maybe its because I don't want to get hurt again like I have before in the past. Its not like I am anything special anyways just dull I have no more life in me. Everyone wanted to go down to the beach and swim but I knew that I couldn't because I didn't have a bathing suit and even if I didn't have one I have too many scars from my cutting. They tried to urge me to go but I kept saying I couldn't because of having no bathing suit and after a while they just gave up. I sat there and watched them swim. It looked like such fun. Paul looked so hot with his washboard abs in his swimming trunks. I couldn't stop ogling him. He had such a dazzling smile.

They finished swimming and they went to eat and I sat alone until Paul came to sit next to me again! I just kept my head down. I heard Billy telling stories about Cold Ones and the shape shifters more in detail than what Jacob had told me about it. I didn't really get into it. My mind was just somewhere else. I kept thinking about how my life could be different. I kept thinking about if I was prettier and I didn't have such a terrible past. Nobody could want me because I'm so broken. I zoned back in and realized that the story was over.

"BELLA!" someone said to my right.

"WHAT!" I said and looked over to see that it was Paul who was trying to get my attention. I looked him in the eye and saw that he had the most beautiful eyes. They were a light hazel color and it looked so good with his dark tan skin. He seemed to be staring at me too. He shook his head like he was trying to clear it of something.

"What are you staring at Pale face?" He said and it came out as a sneer

I looked down embarrassed "nothing" I said shyly I felt like crying. Why does everyone hate me so much? I had to get away ASAP.

"I have to go" I said lowly and as harsh as possible. I got up and ran as fast as I could to my car. I got in and drove away as fast as I could. I went home and did what I haven't done in a long time. I got out my razors from under my bed. I cut into my flesh and watched as the blood flowed down my arm. Watching the blood lulled me to sleep.

I woke up with a lot of blood around me and I quickly cleaned it up before my dad came home to see that. I cleaned up my wound so it wasn't as bad. I called my mom and told her that I wanted to live down there with her and she was so happy. I started packing my stuff and when I was finished I waited for my dad to come home. I didn't have to wait very long. He walked to the door soon after that looking very tired and exhausted. I told him that I wanted to talk to him and he sat down. I explained about how I wanted to go down to live in Florida for a while. I promised that I would come back soon and I was. He was sad but he hugged me and we left. I took one final look at the house before getting in his car. Once we were finally at the airport he got out and hugged me one last time and said goodbye. I got on the plane and said goodbye to Forks for a while and hoped that the next time I came back things would be different. Its time for change.

**Hoped you liked it and once again sorry for such the long wait **

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	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

**So sorry for the long wait. So many things have been happening lately. Things have been crazy! **

BPOV (Bella's point of view)

Today is a new beginning for me, my first day back in Florida again. I felt weird getting on the plane to get there to be completely honest… I felt like there was something pulling me back. I had to look passed it. I had to change. Staying here just isn't healthy for me. Knowing that I'm so far from Forks is comforting. Being around people that actually care about me is… different. I'm not very used to that feeling. I guess it's just something that takes some getting used to.

My mom was so excited to see me! The feelings were mutual. When I got settled in, I slept and slept like I've never slept before. It felt good. When I woke up I had to weirdest feeling… It's so hard to describe. Kinda like a tugging on my heart. I was missing something back in Forks but I'm not sure what that thing is… I just have to shake it off for now until I go back. I need to gain more confidence, which was definitely easier said than done.

*A year later*

I said goodbye to my mom and got on the plane that headed back to Forks. I felt a lot better. I try not to cut anymore. I didn't do it at all when I was in Florida with mom which is great! I had no reason to! I felt wanted and most importantly, I felt so much more loved! I feel a lot more confident in myself and I look a bit different too! My hair looks longer, my boobs got bigger and I look so much healthier! I am kind of excited to be back at home. I needed to figure out what that tugging feeling in my heart was. I'm so curious. Charlie was glad to have me back. He said that he missed me while I was gone, which was surprising because he didn't seem to care much about me being there at all when I was around a year ago…

But anyway, when I got there, my dad told me that there is a cookout in La Push to welcome me back. That was also surprising because I didn't think that anyone cared about me to actually throw a party for me… I packed a bag to head over there with my bathing suit and towel just in case we went to hang out at the beach or go for a swim!

I drove my truck over there and everyone attacked me with hugs. Jacob kept his distance a bit but still said hi. I agreed to be cordial with him on the ride there. I saw Paul again and I was instantly nervous. I blushed and tried to avoid eye contact. He came up to me and said his hello and I looked up at him and looked at how beautiful he was. He smelled woodsy. It was delicious. I loved how close we were and I just wanted to be closer to him. But as our faces were coming closer and closer together, I heard someone calling Paul's name, a girl…

"PAUL!" yelled this girl who had just come out of the house

"Yeah babe?" he said ever so sweetly.

Honey?! Whaaat?! He has a girlfriend? And we were about to kiss?! Oh shit. She was all over him. I put my head down and I felt tears coming and I didn't know why. I felt jealous but it's not like Paul and I were actually dating. So why was I so upset? I was so confused… It all felt so right. I knew it was stupid to feel like he actually liked me. He is beautiful and I'm just a pale face. I just walked away so I could try not to cry. I shouldn't get involved with Paul anyway; he's the biggest player in La Push! I just kept my distance for the night. I really don't want to be just another girl he wants to fuck.

PPOV (Paul's point of view)

She looks so amazing. I'm so glad that she's finally back! I went to go see her after what happened at the beach when she was here last but I was too late because she was already on her way to Florida! I imprinted on her that day she came with Jacob. I didn't want to admit it at the time because it was just so new to me and I was so stubborn and mean! It hurt so much when she left. I felt it in my heart. I just wanted her to be back so bad. While she was gone, I just sat around and drank a lot or had lots of meaningless sex with a bunch of different women. I thought it might make me feel better but it just made my pain hurt even worse of having her away from me. I have a girlfriend now even though I probably shouldn't. Her name is Ally. Things aren't very serious. She's kind of just around… I knew it hurt Bella especially because we were about to kiss when I said hi to her. I felt horrible! I know that I have to break up with Ally so I can be with Bella. I just have to figure out how and then focus on Bella.

**I hope you liked it and sorry for the wait! I'll try updating the chapters faster!**

**Please review your thoughts on the story and if I should keep going! Thank you:) **


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